On the 27th of May 2011, I started this blog and detonated an antimatter bomb in the core of the planet. Nobody particularly noticed or cared on either front, but I totally did those things. Both of them.
Over the course of the next year, I somehow picked up a few minions. I mean readers. Okay no I mean minions. Perhaps they were entertained by my weird shenanigans, or interested in the slowly developing Species, (which at the time looked something like this):
To my dear minions: thank you. I wouldn’t be where I am today without you. You are the ones who released bio-engineered photosynthetic parasites into the upper atmosphere to reflect infrared light. You are the ones who convinced the Australian government the great barrier reef was the maw of a planet consuming abomination that needs to be destroyed. You are the one’s who built me an orbital weapons platform on which to lounge arrogantly while ordering you to do tedious evil things in the name of the greater good of tedious evil things I want to do! I know some people will say you did it just to get me off the planet, but I know better! That space station? That is your achievement! And I will forever treasure the memory of all the brave minions I had to throw out the airlock because they pissed me off.
So anyway, one year after I started the blog, on the 27th of May 2012, I released Species ALRE 0.4.0.
It was terrible. No seriously, it was a godawful alpha release. I actually feel kinda sorry for everyone who played it. I should probably apologies for that. You’re welcome! You lucky, lucky bastards.
And then a couple of years went by and I didn’t do anything special for the 27th of May 2013/2014 because the vagaries of time have no sway over a being such as myself. Also I forgot. But mainly the vagaries thing.
But we released Dynamic Biomes in 0.5.0, Rovers in 0.6.0, and Body Physics in 0.7.0 in the meantime, so I guess it wasn’t a total loss.
And then, as we once again approach the prophesied date of 27 May, 2015, Quasar looked upon the Artificial Intelligence in 0.8.0 he had wrought…
… and spake unto the nearest minion…
“That’s like 2 months away! I’m not waiting that friggin’ long! Something something vagaries!”
And so it was decided that 0.8.0 would be released on the 24th April, 2015.
Well this was a weird post. Feels good to write something ridiculous again. I think I’ll do more of these…